Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh is a Very Serious Football Man. He once called football “the last bastion of hope for toughness in American men,” and believes with every screaming fiber of his being in football’s values. He’s also so secretive that he refuses to release a depth chart. So, in response, Very Fun Football Team Colorado decided to troll the hell out of the Wolverines ahead of their week three matchup.
Colorado did release a depth chart for this week’s game, despite Michigan’s refusal to, except that Colorado’s lists Bill Walton as a defensive back, Happy Gilmore as a punter, Manute Bol as a wide receiver, and Sen. Bernie Sanders as a safety.
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And just to make Michigan a little bit more angry, Colorado will be wearing uniforms that commemorate the Hail Mary it used to beat the Wolverines in 1994.
This is great for two reasons. The first is that Michigan fans turn into crybabies more easily than any other fan base because of this kind of stuff. “Michigan Men” know how to win the right way and with integrity, and don’t have time for your silly fun. They tend to get very mad when you celebrate beating them. Michigan fans are the epitome of “I’m not mad, this is funny to me.” Case in point:
But more than anything, college football is seriously lacking when it comes to harmless trolling like this. Teams don’t want to be seen as gimmicky, and there are a great many Very Serious Football Men in charge. Teams worry that trolling will provide motivation for their opponent, and they don’t want to have to eat crow when they lose. As a result, most teams treat a game—a fun one—with a grave seriousness that it absolutely does not demand.
Colorado is probably going to lose to Michigan, not because of this trolling, but because Michigan is a vastly superior team. But rather than treat this game as an ultra-serious battle of toughness and wits, the Buffaloes are having fun with it. Good on them.
