There was a print of a magpie and a playing card on the wall at my previous therapist’s house. Other miscellaneous objects were in the frame too, but that bird and playing card worked their way into my dreams more times than I could count. Sometimes I’d be strolling along in a dreamland and notice an ace of diamonds underfoot; through the lucidity of my sleep, I’d think to myself: 'For fuck’s sake, nowhere is safe.'
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The physical space of a therapist’s office is enormously important to the act of therapy itself – and it's certainly always been central to what I’ve gone to therapy for. Whether it's a sterile hospital block in southeast London or a musty living room off a high street, these places provide a safe space far from every day life to discuss intimate things that no one else knows about you; to understand the strange connections your brain makes.Now, like pretty much everyone else currently in therapy, I call my psychotherapist from my flat. My therapeutic safe space has become my actual safe space (bed). After a couple of half-failed attempts at recreating the privacy, intimacy and undivided attention I am lucky enough to have, I've worked out how to maximise the at-home therapy session. This is how you can do the same:Therapy spaces, whether private or NHS, are always two things: either clinical or academic and quiet. They’re usually uncluttered, bar some art or books. It’s hard as it is to use both parts of your brain to remember events and search for words that accurately convey nuanced feelings and experience, so don’t add a load of visual and audible mess to your new designated therapy space. Find a quiet corner of your house, bring a comfortable blanket or pillow, a glass of water, a notebook for writing down what the therapist is saying or any action points and homework, and anything else you might need.
Establish and cherish a designated therapy space
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Remove all distractions
Top and tail your session as if it’s a normal one
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Take advantage of the phone or screen acting as a barrier
Communicate with your therapist
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