LAURA JUNE KIRSCH COMMITS CUTE CRIMES

Vice: Why are you doing this? Laura:

I heard you recently stole a ventriloquist dummy. In your Facebook picture it looks like you took him to a party.

It also looks like he is armless. What’s your history with this small fake man?

How did the final nabbing take place?

What did it feel like to achieve your childhood dream?

Speaking of your family, I was looking at your site and your photos of your family are awesome. They seem voyeuristic and like you’re making fun of them. That photo of the dog with the cone approaching the girl looks like he’s a walking Victrola blasting her in the crotch with sound. Does your family ever get sick of being photographed or dislike the moments you’re capturaing of them?

My favorite photo of yours is this one of the girl in the plum dress stepping out of the dark room. The slightly off symmetry, darkness and texture of everything reminds me of dreams. I have a lot of dreams of dimly lit and uncomfortable places. Also I am usually trying to convince some sort of vampire that I’m a vampire too so I don’t get eaten.

What’s going on with these fancy people partying in the bathroom? But there are dudes in this bathroom too. And a giant bathtub.

What’s the story with “Little Darlings”? What were you going to do with all those boas in the first place? You only have one neck.

Who’s this weird transgendered hippy in front of the van? What kinda stuff did he have to say?

What’s the story on Santa Claus making out with the little girl?

Where’d you see this spiderbook thing? “Will you eat or be eaten?” You hear about all the falling tree limbs that are killing people in Central Park these days?

What was that story you told Meg earlier about the guy that gave you bad shivers? That is a bold maneuver. Did he notice that you’d robbed his tip jar? You also told me some story about how you had a goldfish that refused to die the other day. How did that go again? What did the note that you left with the fish say? Check out Laura’s site and photo blog for more beauty and hilarity.