Food

Meet the Die-Hard Smiths Fan Who Bakes Morrissey’s Face Into Cakes

“Girlfriend in a Coma” is probably the best Smiths song to accompany the celebrations that took place this last weekend. A cake-induced food coma, that is.

Meet Vivian Guerrero. She has attended more than 150 Morrissey concerts worldwide and she recently extended her ways of praising Moz’s greatness by baking cakes with his handsome mug plastered all over it—torched chocolate chest hair included.

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Cupcakes, birthday cakes, and even the occasional piece of pan dulce, if you ask nicely.

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In celebration of Morrissey turning the ripe old age of 57 a couple weeks ago, Guerrero baked a stunning, three-tier cake in his honour. It was enjoyed by more than 800 other die-hard Morrissey lovers who attended Part Time Punks‘ “Morrissey Night,” a bi-monthly party where LA’s Morrissey fans come out and cry, dance, and sing along to his songs all night at Echoplex.

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MUNCHIES caught up with Guerrero over the phone the day after the event (post-cake sugar high) to find out how the idea of blending her love for Morrissey and baking cakes came about—and why, despite Morrissey proclaiming meat to be murder, she decided it was best for the cake not to be vegan.

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MUNCHIES: How are you doing today? Vivian Guerrero: I’m feeling much better after this intense project. I spent over 100 hours making this cake. The hardest part was trying to get Morrissey’s face exactly right. It was my swan song.

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On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate yourself as a hardcore Morrissey fan? Oh, God. An eight? I’m still around the 150 range when it comes to concerts. There are people out there who are way more hardcore than I am.

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Cakes and Morrissey—how did you make this connection? Ever since I was really young, I was obsessed with food, and I’ve always been talented in art. One day, I just merged the two via cakes. I’m inspired by the things I love. For me, this means Morrissey.

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What is in your Moz cake repertoire? I work an office job during the day but I do Morrissey-themed cupcakes for a lot of my friends on the side. The flavour of those cupcakes is black velvet with black frosting. The cupcakes are placed on black cupcake liners, too. This is inspired by the lyrics for his song “Unloveable,” which goes like: “I wear black on the outside ’cause black is how I feel on the inside.” I’m experimenting with Morrissey conchas and other pan dulce, too.

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What inspired each detailed tier on this Morrissey cake? The bottom tier was made up edible portraits and Morrissey’s classic silhouette, since a lot of Morrissey fans can identify him just by his shadow. The second tier was based on the Salford’s Lads Club, which is a pilgrimage destination for a lot of Morrissey fans. It is where he met the rest of The Smiths in the UK [Editor’s note: Morrissey first met guitarist Johnny Marr at a Patti Smith concert at the Manchester Apollo in 1978. Marr knew bassist Andy Rourke from school and drummer Mike Joyce was recruited to the band after an audition]. The third tier was all gladioluses. For many, many years, Morrissey would throw these flowers out to the audience. On the very top, there was a chocolate Morrissey, which I sculpted myself.

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What flavour was the cake? The cake was a chocolate and vanilla swirl with a vanilla bean icing. I couldn’t decide on one or the other so I figured I should do the best of both worlds. I was just trying to please the masses.

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Was it vegan? It was not, and I’m going to be crucified for that. I know it. People are already asking me, “How could you make a Morrissey cake that isn’t vegan?” The answer to that is because in the test run, vegan cakes don’t stack. They crumble. I did several test runs and they fell apart. It didn’t work. Besides, he is vegan now but he was vegetarian for many years. There was one guy in the party who broke his vegan diet to eat it, though.

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How many Morrissey-themed cakes have you created? I’ve lost count. Definitely over 30 by this point.

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If Morrissey is reading this right now, what would you like you tell him? There is a Morrissey lyric for every happening in your life, and I mean from the very mundane to the very euphoric. You inspire me every day.

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Do you have any future plans with this Moz-patisserie gift of yours? I want to find a team to work with. I’m down to intern, even. I’m just tired of doing this alone.

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Thank you for speaking with me.