‘Pizza Tower’ Is Still Pixelated Platforming Perfection

While my online presence isn’t as huge as I’d like it to be, you could ask any person who has ever interacted with me how much Pizza Tower dominated every facet of my life. When people think of a fat Italian, most are going to think about the red-capped fellow from that one particular Nintendo franchise, but my mind has been permanently altered to think about Peppino Spaghetti.

You may be thinking to yourself: what, exactly, is Pizza Tower? And it’s a question you should be asking yourself because Pizza Tower is the best damn platformer that has come out in the past 20+ years. The debut title for Tour De Pizza still has a death grip on my psyche over a year past its launch, and it’s something that isn’t expiring anytime soon.

‘Pizza Tower’ Is One Spicy Meatball

I would consider myself a connoisseur of all things wild and wacky. Not trying to be edgy, but I’ve always preferred the madcap adventures of the Wario Land series over the standard cookie-cutter adventures of Mario. That’s why, as soon as I saw what appeared to be a spiritual successor to the long-dormant Wario Land franchise, I was already sold. Pair it with John Kricfalusi-esque animation reminiscent of ’90s cartoons, and I’m fully invested.

Pizza Tower is fast and furious; every step taken by Peppino is accentuated with gorgeous animation and quality sound design. Every stage is memorable, with a unique theme peppering your eyes and ears in unanimous bliss. And the stage end theme? Don’t even get me started on that. “It’s Pizza Time” is a masterclass in stress and deserves to be heard by everyone.

If you’re here for a story, it’s not the most in-depth. Peppino needs to climb the titular Pizza Tower to face off against Pizzaface. With his pizzeria on the line, there’s plenty to fight for. But we aren’t here for the story; it’s the piping-hot gameplay, music, and stage design that pushes Pizza Tower to new heights.

Each stage you run is graded on a scale of F-Rank to P-Rank. The actions you do, the combos you make, and the secrets you find in each level affect your score. It’s the perfect game for those who love the idea of speedrunning through a platformer and for those who want to scour every corner of the map for secrets and collectibles.

It’s Hard to Be Perfect in a Crowded Genre

“Perfection” is a fickle word. For something to be perfect, there needs to be zero flaws. And while there may be some that argue with me here, I find Pizza Tower to be the perfect definition of the word. Tight controls, incredibly ambitious level design, memorable music and enemies. Pizza Tower is the Supreme in a world full of Pepperoni.

And to do all of this, to make a game of this caliber as your first project? Tour De Pizza needs to be studied because it’s frankly an understatement to praise them enough for the work they did. There’s just something so magical here.

Could it be the blinding pain of nostalgia creeping into my veins? Or rather, is it the infectious music tainting my system and making me blind to the world of other platformers? I’m not sure exactly what it is that captivates me so about Pizza Tower, but I do know this. It’s a one-of-a-kind experience everyone should embark on.

in conclusion

Challenging but rewarding. Fast-paced but forgiving. If I had to describe Pizza Tower in only one word, it would have to be bliss. In an incredibly crowded genre, it’s hard to stand out this much above your peers, but this did it in one fell swoop.

Oh, and you can play as The Noise, the horrifying amalgamation of The Noid and non-copyright infringement. Just do yourself a favor and pick this up as soon as you can.