Travel

This Flaming Carry-On Bag Is Proof We Should Just Stay Off Airplanes

If you’re searching for yet another reason to swear off flying forever, enjoy: A carry-on bag burst into flames on an airplane last weekend, forcing airline staff and passengers to wage a bitter war against the flames with liquids from the drink cart, New York Post reports.

According to the Post, the fire started on a China Southern Airlines flight in Guangzhou, China, just before takeoff. Passengers reported smoke billowing out from an overhead bin, and when flight attendants went in for a look, they uncovered a carry-on bag already engulfed in fire.

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In a passenger’s video of the mayhem, you can see a flight attendant in the aisle, valiantly flinging water from open bottles in an attempt to extinguish the blaze, before a man hops up on a seat to get a better angle and goes to town on the fire with a container of orange juice, which appears to do the trick.

Luckily, the plane was still on the runway and hadn’t begun its three-hour flight to Shanghai, so passengers were able to deplane and wait for another less on-fire airplane, according to a statement from the airline on Weibo. Fire officials were able to board the flight and deal with whatever smoldering ash was left after the OJ bath and no injuries were reported.

The carry-on bag appears to have caught on fire thanks to an exploding portable phone charger, likely the same kind of lithium-ion battery that got Samsung phones and hoverboards banned by TSA a few years back. As the Post notes, you aren’t allowed to check lithium-ion batteries in your luggage, but it’s still chill to bring them in your carry-on. Unfortunately, you can’t bring a couple pints of juice along too, for safety’s sake, since large liquids aren’t allowed through security.

Why are we still subjecting ourselves to the horrors of air travel? Planes are farty, miserable sky prisons that drive even the most serene among us to the breaking point. What kind of punishing guilt do we all secretly harbor that makes us continue to put up with this? Why aren’t we content to just stay here, on the ground, where we belong? How much more will it take?

Unfortunately, most of our other travel options are pretty bleak now, too, so it’s probably best to just accept defeat and never leave the house again. Get comfortable, everyone.

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