Krispy Kreme Discount Causing Massive, Hours-Long Traffic Jams

When Krispy Kreme doughnuts debuted in New York City 20 years ago, the chain was so mobbed that neighbors of newly opened stores lamented the constant hubbub, noise, and chaos that they caused. A New York Times story from March 1997 describes how residents of Chelsea were perturbed by the overpowering smell of doughnuts and sound of fans emanating from the location on West 23rd Street, which at one point sold 14,400 doughnuts a day. The store was fined thousands of dollars for noise and odor violations, and was accused of making a local community garden reek of glaze and frying oil. But while the neighborhood suffered, doughnut lovers continued to flock for a fix.

"To their fans, Krispy Kreme doughnuts are to ordinary doughnuts what the Garden of Eden is to apple orchards," the article reads. "When the neon 'Hot Now' sign lights up, signaling that a fresh batch is emerging from the doughnut machine, passers-by crowd in and cars double-park out front."

You might think that two decades later, and 80 years into the history of the chain, the irresistible lure of Krispy Kreme's sugary, oily, notoriously decadent doughnuts may have cooled. But that doesn't seem to be the case.

Today, in celebration of the chain's 80th birthday, Krispy Kreme locations are kindly offering a discount: a dozen original glazed doughnuts for 80 cents with the purchase of a dozen doughnuts at regular price. Not exactly buy-one-get-one-free, but close enough. Normally, a dozen glazed doughnuts costs $7.99.

How much extra business would you guess that such an offer could produce? Maybe double the usual sales? Long lines for a couple hours?

Instead, locals in Charleston, South Carolina were stuck in a traffic standstill for hours, according to The Post and Courier, with unrelenting congestion throughout the area starting at 6 AM and spanning well into the afternoon because of the promotion. Lines of cars blocked parts of the highway and police officers had to be called in to direct traffic, and will remain posted by the Krispy Kreme until midnight tonight. Thankfully, Krispy Kreme—and not taxpayers—are paying for the necessary police presence required to keep the situation under control.

"Everybody is getting to work late because of this," Jere Young, a local shuttle driver, told The Post and Courier. "They literally should just line up orange cones all the way down 526 and have a designated doughnut lane for whenever they run specials."

And the Charleston store isn't the only place where the discount has stoked Krispy Kreme mania. Across the country, in Burbank, California, police issued a traffic advisory in anticipation of the doughnut deal. Other stores, including locations in Sacramento, Chicago, and Memphis, also experienced insane lines and doughnut delays for customers.

2017 might not be the worst of Krispy Kreme hysteria; in addition to the menace to neighborhoods that locations presented back in the late 90s, there was the time the Minneapolis Star-Tribute was criticized for sending at least three reporters to cover the opening of a new location. But as recently as February, new locations mobbed with customers were experiencing two-hour waits for doughnuts—which, inexplicably, plenty of people seemed more than happy to endure for their sugar and fat fix.

Hey, if you want to trade a significant portion of your day to save seven bucks on a box of doughnuts that will offer you fleeting joy until you inevitably overeat (after all, you are leaving the Krispy Kreme with not 12 but 24 doughnuts in order to get the deal) and then descend into a tailspin of self-loathing as you sugar-crash, follow your dreams!

The chain even has a new celebrity endorsement: Shaquille O'Neal announced this week that he's hatching a plan

to own 100 Krispy Kreme shops

. Looks like Krispy Kreme mania isn't going anywhere.