A new study revealed that everyone’s preferences for physical appearances in a potential mate are grossly exaggerated if not flat-out wrong. For instance, when a guy says he wants a slender athletic woman, that man is very likely full of shit and their actual preference includes all sorts of body types.
Both sexes overestimate the importance of physical traits, especially when it comes to sexual dimorphism — the extent to which facial features appear more masculine or feminine. Turns out, you don’t need to look like the apex of masculinity for a woman to like you, and you don’t need to be hyper-feminine for a man to like you, the PLOS One study found.
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Using 3D models of faces with varying degrees of sexual dimorphism, researchers found that both men and women misjudged the ideal facial features of the opposite sex. “Women overestimated the facial femininity that men prefer in a partner and men overestimated the facial masculinity that women prefer in a partner,” the researchers reported.
Essentially, women like a little femininity in their man’s facial features, and men like a touch of masculinity in their women — though, whether they’re willing to say any of this out loud is another matter altogether.
The researchers theorize that a lot of these misperceptions are based on what boils down to self-loathing. There are parts of yourself that you don’t like so you want your ideal partner to be loaded up with all of the features you wish you had.
So if you’re a guy wondering why you still can’t land a girlfriend even after you’ve sculpted yourself into a marble statue of a Roman gladiator, it could be because you completely misunderstood what women want out of a man’s physical appearance. That’s not to say you won’t find someone who’s totally into the whole Maximus Decimus Meridius thing, but keep in mind that what we say we want and what we actually want are likely two different things.