It’s a classic Friday night story. Girl meets boy, girl and boy share saliva, girl goes back to boy’s house. The next morning, in a state of post-coital pillow-talk bliss, they find out they’re related. It’s a serious issue that affects a lot of people and doesn’t get enough press coverage because, selfishly, no one wants to admit fucking a blood relative in the national media.
Except for in Iceland, that is, where accidental incest is so much of a problem that a company have developed a phone app in an effort to cut down on sexy family reunions. But is such an app still necessary? In a world as sexually liberated as this, is incest still a taboo? Yes, obviously it is, but I thought it would be fun to ask people if they’d have sex with a relative – either close or distant – anyway.
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Robin (left) and Aaron.
Aaron, 29, designer: Pretty much just no. I’d say 100 percent no.
Robin, 27, art gallery, director: Unequivocally not.
How far removed would a relative have to be for you to hook up with them?
Aaron: Entirely.
Robin: They could be in no way related to me.
Three times removed?
Aaron: No.
Robin: No.
What if it was an accident? Would you feel guilty?
Aaron: Wow.
Robin: I’d feel a lot of guilt, remorse and resentment.
Aaron: I’d get as far away as I could from that person. I’d possibly leave this earth. I’d tell nobody.
Jessica (left) and Melanie.
Melanie, 22, trainee industrial clerk: We’re German.
That’s OK – it’s a global question.
In that case, no.
Jessica, 19, trainee industrial clerk: Me too.
What if it was a really far-removed cousin?
Melanie: Maybe.
How far removed?
Very far. If it was someone who’d married into the family, that would be OK. But bloody – I don’t know how to say this – no.
That was a good way to say it.
Kate, 23, fashion recruiter: Yes. I’ve slept with my step cousin, but that doesn’t really count.
He’s not related by blood?
No, so it’s OK. I wouldn’t sleep with an actual cousin.
Did you know you were cousins?
Yes, but we’re step cousins! Also, I was pretty drunk.
Do you regret it?
No, it’s fine.
Alright.
Jordan, 27, labourer: No.
What if it was a step cousin?
No. If it was blood related, then no.
But if they’re not blood related it’s fine?
Yes.
What if you accidently had sex with a blood relative?
I’d be mortified. I’d apologise.
That’s polite.
Simon, 40, branding consultant: No, I would not.
Really? What if they were a step cousin?
No, definitely not. I’m a married man. But even if I wasn’t married, I don’t think I would.
What if you did it by accident?
I wouldn’t do it again.
That’s sensible.
Previously – Would You Take MDMA for Therapy?
