The Smell of a Boy’s Anus: The Scented Oil

Guys, I’m here to talk to you about this amazing new product. No, it’s not going to help keep your floors spotless or remove the gunk from your dishwasher, this product is about aroma.

Smelling like vanilla is for cheap, teenage whores. Chanel attracts flies and starving artist types. You need something fresh. Something exciting. Something edgy that pushes the fragrance envelope and makes a passer by get a whiff of you and do a double sniff. You need: “The Smell of a Boy’s Anus” the latest scent in the forbidden collection from Japanese brand Tamatoys (you might remember them as the folks that brought you “schoolgirl urine” and “schoolgirl armpit” scents back in 2002).

Videos by VICE

“The Smell of A Boy’s Anus” scented oil is a part of a series called “The forbidden scents – experience that smell one more time.” [Hi. This is my real voice now. The implications in that tag line are just… out of this world.] Just one spritz from this “real anal smell bottle” will keep you surrounded by “the pheromones emitted from the anus of a cute boy” all day. No, this is not feces in a can, guys. This scent is devoted to making you smell purely of anus. Tamatoys confirms, “It has a strong musky perfume smell, tinged with a pungent odor.” Sweet, musky fresh cute boy smell all day long, So, whether you want to wear it yourself, or just sit in a dark, dank computer lab huffing the bottle all day, “The Smell of a Boy’s Anus” never let’s you leave that crack between the cheeks. Christmas is right around the corner you know.