This article first appeared on VICE Canada.
Golden showers, water sports, or piss play, whatever you call it, urophilia has recently had a resurgence in mainstream interest, following some unsavoury and as yet unproven leaks about a pre-White House Donald Trump. As a kink or fetish, getting sexually excited by urine or the thought of urine is still taboo, even in a world where suburban housewives read 50 Shades of Grey on the subway. A 2010 survey by San Francisco University’s Jennifer Eve Rehor found that of over 1700 women surveyed only 36.5 percent said they’d peed on or been peed on by a lover, whereas over 90% percent reported being spanked. So why are most people still so uncomfortable with urine play? Luna Matatas recently taught a class at Toronto sex shop Good For Her called, ‘Intro to Urine Play’ and I spoke with her just before the seminar to get a urophilia guide for beginners.
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Some people like the sensation of it, the warmth or the wetness. Some people like the taste, they like the idea of ingesting something that’s considered really taboo. Some people really enjoy it as a form of power play, they either want to give to a person that’s submitting to them or the person submitting to them wants to take it from their dominant as a sign of surrender of the ultimate sign of submission, taking someone inside of you and taking their waste or their fluids inside of you. I really enjoy it as a sign of worship and ritual, so my submissive would drink me as a sign of taking goddess’ golden nectar.
Why is urine play still taboo?
I think it’s because we have such a heavy focus on sanitation and hygiene as a society. We have an emphasis on cleanliness particularly around things that come out of your body and we’re constantly bombarded with messages that pee is dirty, pee should be contained, pee should be private. So a lot of people want to explore the taboo of it to be naughty and go against it. The sanitation piece is still very mainstream and so to even bring it up with your partner you’re really worried that they’re gonna think you’re filthy or something is deviant about you or that something’s wrong with you because you want to pervert something that everybody else accepts as wrong.
Let’s say you’re brand new to pee—what do you need to know?
I would figure out what it is about pee that turns you on. Because if it is about sensation then that opens up a range of play for you. Some people are even turned on by the act of being denied the ability to urinate so they get a tense feeling, a feeling of fear, of being out of the their body. Some people are really turned on by wearing it so they like the smell of urine, the wetness of it. So I’d start by exploring the fantasy of it, what do you masturbate to when you think about pee, is it a dominant person, is it just kind of pissing on each other, is it a sensual thing? Once you’re able to figure out those flavours for you or your kink, then you’re able to look for someone who’s like-minded.
OK, what should you drink or not drink?
Lots of water, things that are diuretics so like dandelion tea, beer, coffee, things like that, that will push your pee through. If you’re into [it] because of the taste, some people may want an enhanced taste, so morning pee, asparagus, it depends on what they’re actually looking for. If you want to change the colour of your pee, beets or for sweeter pee, pineapple juice. But mostly water, keep hydrating.
Does that ever take you out of “the mood,” cause you’re just constantly drinking water?
I make it part of the foreplay or the scene.
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What about the mess? How can you relax when you’re like, “oh no my sheets”?
If you’re not doing a large amount of pee play, you can put down a towel. If you’re doing a large amount, let’s say you’re peeing on someone in a place that’s not a tub or a shower, you can pee into a vessel first like a bowl or I pee into a chalice because we’re ritualizing pee. Definitely there’s incontinent pads or puppy pads you can use, they’re disposable and you can just throw them out.
What about Trump? Do you think he’s given pee play a bad name?
I think his incident brought up a fork for pee play. It was an opportunity for sex educators who did an excellent job of putting out information that was de-shaming and so if we’re talking about this let’s talk about it in a way where people can move their barriers so they can have the kind of pleasure they want. And then for other people it brought up more shame because people were saying it’s disgusting and because it was Trump it brought up how you felt about him. So it brought it into the mainstream but it also brought up a lot of kink-shaming.
Who do you think is the first person to ever pee on another person and then immediately have sex after?
I don’t know, I hope it was like a rock star or something.
Right, yeah I was going to say someone biblical.
Oh yeah, maybe Judas?
Sure or Mary Magdalene?
You’re right, that makes sense.
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Lead image via MaxPixel, edited by VICE.
