This article originally appeared on VICE US
It’s long been said all stories are the same, that there are no new songs left to be sung in this wide world of ours, but a new novella is proving the exception to the rule. It’s called Trump Temptations: The Billionaire and the Bellboy, and its author, 22-year-old Los Angeles-based comedian Elijah Daniel wrote it in an evening while egged on by his 90k-plus followers on Twitter and a bottle of trashy white zinfandel. The 21-page book that resulted is, as its title suggests, about a steamy romp between Donald Trump and a bellboy.
Videos by VICE
A few of the e-book’s more sultry passages include, “His hands felt like an old dried out gingerbread house. I was in love,” and, “He stood there in front of me, like a tall stallion. With his oily orange skin glistening in the sunlight as if he were a soggy cheeto, his hair unkempt and messy, like a gorgeous rat’s nest.”
The novella would be a throwaway joke but that when it was released Thursday morning it was a huge hit, reaching number two in several categories and 984 overall on Amazon. Sales got a boost, says Daniel, when a fake Donald Trump Twitter account run by Anonymous began tweeting about it:
We gave Daniel a quick ring during his hectic second day of being a bestselling author.
VICE: Tell me about how the idea of this all came about.
Elijah Daniel: Just marijuana and alcohol, truthfully. That’s pretty much it. I should’ve known better than to smoke a strain of weed called “Banana Crack,” but here we are. I tweeted the idea as a joke, but so many people were telling me to do it that I decided to just write it.
What has the last day or so been like since it was released?
It’s been fun, and very interesting. It’s crazy to see how much the internet supports my blatant stupidity and ignorance. My followers have always been supportive of everything I do, but to see so many people sharing and buying a Donald Trump porn book that I wrote drunk is pretty cool.
Were you ever worried Amazon wouldn’t accept the book? Is that a thing? Do they turn things down?
Yeah, I was a little worried about that. It says that graphic sexual content in books won’t be accepted and there’s definitely some really fucking gross shit in this book. I’m not sure how strict they are on it, but mine made it through the approval process. I definitely would’ve loved to see the look on the intern’s face who had to read and approve it.
Are there any lines in the book you’re particularly proud of? I’ve seen the “ass like a stack of pancakes” get quoted quite a bit.
The “I opened the door and quickly jogged up the stairs, making sure nobody saw the bulging blood sausage I was rocking,” quote is definitely the part that made me laugh the most.
Is there anything in the book that grossed you out while you were writing?
I had a part of the third chapter where I called Donald’s nipples “moist and supple” but had to delete it because it grossed me out too much.
What in the book have you found has resonated most with readers?
I think the absurdity of the entire thing is what drew the masses to it. My followers kickstarted it by sharing because they’re used to me doing insanely dumb things on the internet, from my Taco Bell hand tattoo to me starting a White House petition to make Miley Cyrus’s “Party In The USA” our national anthem. They love the dumb, outlandish things I do.
There’s a heavy 50 Shades of Grey influence on the book. What do you say to critics who call you a ripoff artist?
I’m glad! It’s 50 Shades of Grey parody, of sorts. Most of the sexual parts of the book were written to poke fun at, and be a more disturbing version of, the trash book that E. L. James wrote.
Champions of the book have compared your voice to Jonathan Franzen, Jonathan Safran Foer, and Jonathan Swift. All the great Jonathans of literature, really. Do you give those comparisons any real consideration or does the weight of it feel too suffocating?
Those Jonathan comparisons are flattering, but this entire question just made me think of Jonathan Taylor Thomas and wonder how he’s doing. Miss you, JTT!
You’ve talked about writing two more books, making it a trilogy. What can readers expect from the next two books?
I have “Donald blows out a cloud of vape smoke and slaps Hillary Clinton’s bare ass while she rides a hoverboard” written down in an idea notepad, but we’ll have to see where the alcohol leads me! I’ll definitely be live-tweeting the entire thing and getting the audience more involved in the next ones.
More from VICE:
Britain and Donald Trump Deserve Each Other
What Life Is Like As an Amateur Comic On the Open-Mic Circuit
The Long Love Affair Between ‘Saturday Night Live’ and Politics
